"Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self."

Monday, September 26, 2011


Better late than never, right?

To be honest I haven't done anything to further my educational goals this week.
I take that back.  I made a decision that should make the task of going back to school easier.

For a while now I haven't done much with my etsy shop.  I've let it sit and languish.
I have plenty of items in my closet and garage that I could list for sale (my husband can attest to that), but in the end it wasn't enough.
Yes, I enjoy the hunt and I enjoy taking the pictures of my items.
But the actual business of it all with writing descriptions, packaging, and shipping... notsomuch.

Now, I know that I'm fortunate to be able to say "Hey, I don't like this as much as I thought I would, so I'll just not do it anymore."  But the truth of the matter is that at this point, the only reason I would continue would be out of fear of being seen as a failure or a flake.
And you know what?  My other goals are more important than an irrational fear of what someone might possibly be thinking of me.

(That's my BigBoy's "think of me what you want" face for you.)

I had to try it.  I learned from it.  I didn't sit around wondering what might have happened.
Also, I see now that it was mostly a way for me to put off dealing with the larger picture.
Going back to school and getting a degree will serve my family more than the extra money I made from my shop.
Come next semester, there will be one less distraction for me to deal with.

In the spirit of making changes and learning from what doesn't work for me, I've decided to stop sharing my exact numbers gained or lost on the scale every week on my WW Wednesdays.
I'm returning to my old tried-and-true method of starting. over. every. day.
No matter how much I tried to convince myself that a little challenge was okay, the truth is that for me, it's not what I like or what keeps me on track.
The pressure of it threw me off and made it not fun.  Getting healthier is supposed to be a good thing!  Not something that causes you anxiety.

Of course I am still moving forward in my weight-loss efforts, but I'm going to stick with my "Any amount down is alright with me" attitude about it all.
Again, I tried it.  I learned from it.  Now I'm doing what's best for me instead of getting so off-track I can't see the path anymore.

So, come Wednesday I will share how my week has been, but not numerically.  I'm sure I'll share my total around my big B-Day, though.  :)

Challenge participants, please feel free to continue in your efforts!
I support you all in achieving your goals in ways that work FOR YOU.
Thank you for understanding that I had to shake things up for myself and my life, and please feel free to continue to share your progress in whatever manner you wish.
The only thing that is changing is that *I* am not sharing my numbers, nor am I holding myself to set number goals during the remaining 10 weeks of the Challenge.

So, anyone else MAKIN IT HAPPEN this week?

No comments: